How to Put Together a Grief Care Package
Three years ago, I started prototyping grief care packages on my kitchen table. I taped down a grid with labels like “something to eat,” “something to drink,” “something for self-care,” and even “something to burn.”
After endless iterations, I shipped Beyond Words Co. “box zero” with nervousness—the tangible start of my business vision.
Since then, our care packages evolved as we’ve developed a deeper understanding of our recipients’ needs and honed our own knowledge and expertise for designing to support through difficult times.
If you want to support someone in pain with a care package, I hope the elements that inform our design can help do the same for you. The grieving process is complex, and varies from one situation to another. But certain facets of grief tend to hold true for most, and finding items that support through each is how you can create a grief care package that uses empathy to serve purpose, rather than just signal sympathy.
Grief Care Package Gift Selections
Your starting premise should be “simplicity.” Items that provide a range of holistic support. It’s an idea we’ve refined over time, and ensures a rounded care package approach that addresses body, mind, and spirit.
The body—mind—spirit framework gives a foundation to design from, but items often overlap with benefits to each tenet. For example, a cup of tea can hold healing moments for our body, a time of reflection for our mind, and perhaps a time for prayer or meditation.
Care Package Healing Items For The Body
Grief significantly impacts our physical bodies, as I learned from In one of my first personal experiences in observing grief in others.
A grieving individual can experience a range of physical impacts. A few are:
Difficulty falling or staying asleep (or disturbing nightmares)
Changes in appetite
Headaches
Nausea
Feelings of restlessness
Fatigue
Weakness
Changes in engaging in physical activities and others
That list reads like the fine print of common symptoms for a prescription medication, where each may affect the individual or may not. You can’t know until you try it out. The difference with grief is that there are no other options out there; you have to work through whatever it doles out. A grief care package offering items that can support the body through a variety of these physical impacts has a better chance of helping with the healing process.
When selecting care package items that heal the body, think food, drink, and self-care products.
Here are some ideas and considerations to get you started:
The Best Food And Drink Products For A Care Package
Protein (nuts, protein and snack bars, oatmeal, or plant-based protein-bites)
Teas, mugs, or tumblers that gently nudge toward staying hydrated
Mindful incorporation of caffeine
Healthy, wholesome snacks with beneficial ingredients
Treats that indulge but use natural sweeteners, like maple syrup or honey. These are often lower on the glycemic index and can help avoid a sugar crash and added physical upset.
Considerations For Physical Self-Care Products In A Care Package
Refrain from products with artificial fragrances that could worsen headaches or nausea.
Use natural and organic ingredients when possible.
Use of essential oils with properties known to support ailments at-hand (e.g., lavender for supporting rest, spearmint for headaches)
Items that can be taken on-the-go to work, perhaps to support through memorial services, at the hospital, treatment appointments, or can be set easily on a nightstand
Be mindful of the recipient’s situation regarding time (e.g., for a recipient described as a “busy, working mom,” you might opt for essential oil shower steamers vs. bath salts)
Beautiful handkerchiefs to let out healing tears as they come
Care Package Healing Items For The Mind:
Grief takes its toll on our cognitive, emotional, and even social reactions and experiences.
You may be familiar with well-known responses to grief, such as disbelief, anger, sadness, and depression. Now, layer in a few more: Guilt. Shame. Panic.
Often, those grieving a loss will experience a wide range of these emotions and move back and forth between them. Additionally, impact to cognition in the form of trouble concentrating, feeling overwhelmed, being distracted, or even impact to self-esteem occurs (that was atop my list for some time!).
Social lives are not left untouched through grief either, and family, friend, and work relationships and interactions are usually impacted.
Being knowledgeable and mindful of these impacts will aid you greatly in creating a sympathy care package.
Considerations For Care Package Healing Items For The Mind
Provide ways to offer reflection or even respite via methods like journaling or note-taking.
Minor distractions or ways to concentrate focus with small puzzles or games that are not overly challenging.
Books that do not force the reader to read cover-to-cover; we often opt for books with resources and tips on grief or loss that can be thumbed through spontaneously, or books with beautiful art and illustrations; or shorter stories or poetry.
Care Package Healing Items For The Spirit:
I’m often struck, but not surprised, at how often spiritual support arises as a central part of the sympathy and condolence card messages we write (these are optional messages from the care package giver that we hand-write and include with the package).
With the exception of custom requests, we do not include items specific to any religion, but we do acknowledge and recognize the critical role that spiritual care can hold for our recipients. If you know of or share a recipient’s specific religious beliefs, items reflecting them are appropriate. If not, such things may not be appreciated or helpful.
There are several ways to offer spiritual support in a grief care package that don’t have religious implications.
Considerations For Spiritual Support Items In A Care Package
Candles and matches that offer a moment for prayer, meditation, or reflection
Room mists that can transport an individual to a more relaxed, calm state
Tools for writing, journaling, and note-taking
Ritual items that represent cleansing or release, such as organic sage bundles, flying wish paper
Small mementos like stones, gems, wooden objects, hand-sewn items to be used for meditation, prayer, haptic relief, and reflection
Everyone experiences grief and loss in their own unique ways. When you design a grief care package personal to someone you know and love, it will go that much further in giving them strength through their trial.